Reply to Not Invited to Half Sibling's Wedding

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My guess would be that the stepfamily played nice while the dad was alive and now the true colors are coming out.[/quote]

I'm a step family, second marriage (not an affair, long divorced before I came into the picture) and I recently had this conversation with my adult son when he was visiting.  We had a attended a friend's wedding and I was his plus one.  He did not want to take a date, so I was his plus one (that and I knew the groom since he was a little boy).  My DS told me his wedding will be on the smaller side when he has one, he hates anything over 50 and prefers more intimate weddings that he has experienced.  Now I realize this is not his decision alone so we'll see what happens down the road, but he also told me cousins and step siblings will not be invited.  He said I enjoy spending time with them but they really aren't a part of my day to day life and truly know nothing about me.  He said that on his wedding day he wants to be surrounded by those who have had his back (friends and families) and when I questioned about his step sisters he simply said, they know nothing about my life and chosen to be holiday sisters who I see maybe once a year.  Additionally he added there is some hurt for all the times he has tried to get together with them for dinner when he is in there town and feels always as if it's been an intrusion, almost as if they were nice to him because they shared a dad.  His words, feelings, not mine.  I hope he'll reconsider when that time comes, but it's never been my place to force family relationships on my children once they became adults.  I have very happy relationships with them and I want to keep it that way.  [/quote]
OP said that half-cousins are invited, and she is a half-sibling who grew up in the same house, not a step-sibling. They all even recently vacationed together. It's my bet that, as usual, the bride is making the guest list and for some reason, OP did not make the cut and the groom was spineless about it. I think it's worth a phone call to the brother to congratulate him and see if he wants to explain. Send a gift or not. IMO, no gift would not burn the bridge but be a reasonable response. [/quote]

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