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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]NP here. 
I have a happy marriage and DH is a wonderful husband and father.  For me it was a combination of -
- Having great parents, happy childhood and adulthood and seeing example of a good marriage growing up. 
- Having extremely supportive male figures in my life, namely, my two grandfathers, dad, uncles, brothers, my research advisor. 
- Being very well educated and financially emancipated. 
- Not caring if I ever married. My life was full and meaningful even as a single woman. 
- Having a LOT of male friends, relatives and collegues.  I learned something from each of them. I was however not in a relationship (or hooking up) with them.  I just remained comfortable in any male dominated enviornment. 
- Doing the work necessary ([b]along with my DH)[/b] to make our marriage work. It is a choice sans abuse/adultry/addiction. 
 [/quote]

The bolded is never guaranteed, though. And it can go away, seemingly especially when men hit big life milestones like losing a parent or go through a midlife crisis. [/quote]

Well, my DH is 57.  Lost his dad recently and his mom is not doing well  either. He has remained positive and loving.

In my own life, I have had exampelary and moral men who have helped me to grow and I trust and respect them. Yes, there are jerky men and jerky women, and I do not attract them in my orbit.  I assume that husbands want to be good husbands and loving dads. Not being a pollyanna here. If you have education, family support, a sense of right and wrong and financial independence - you are more likely to not make wrong choices in selection of a mate. Also, if you do make a wrong choice or are fooled by a con-man, you will get out of that situation very easily. [/quote]

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