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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just have your own party for the kid. [/quote]

Lol, I can just see the posts now: My son is friends with Larlo, whose parents are divorced. DS got invited to Larlo's birthday party and happily went and I sent DS with a nice gift. Now we just got an invitation for ANOTHER birthday party for Larlo, this one hosted by his mom. Do I have to send another gift of the same value? Can I skip giving a gift since DS already gave one? [/quote]

I know several divorced families and there is always one big party for the kid with school/sports friends invited at a venue or wherever. Both parents show up. That is “the” big bash. Maybe they host smaller events on their own, I don’t really know. But I think the ex is being really selfish by hijacking the main event. OP’s options are now either be treated as a third wheel/guest for her own child’s party or create social awkwardness for her child by trying to host a second party.

OP, I get why you are upset. I agree with PPs that your best option now is to show up with a smile for your kid. Be glad your ex is footing the bill. Go ahead and let them do the work. But as someone who actually enjoys planning my kids’ parties, decorating the cake, planning the theme, etc. I’d be really sad to have this unilaterally taken away from me.

Perhaps you can modify your custody agreement to an every other year scenario where you take turns planning. Next year you should get to pick the venue and plan. I think it’s totally bizarre that anyone is suggesting two parties is the solution. I actually think it’s way more confusing to a child if their parents can’t put their personal crap aside and jointly throw a party on one day a year. [/quote]

But if Mom/OP plans the birthday bash, it's OK for the dad to feel like a third wheel?[/quote]

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