Reply to Missing out on childhood for tournaments, etc

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sorry OP. I am like you in that I want a balanced life with some flexibility on weekends for social events, community events, nature, spontaneity. But as you see on this post, there are many who want an ultra-structured life for their kids.

You can’t change them so just do what a PP said and book around your children’s 3-4 closest friends. And hopefully a few of the rest will be free too.[/quote]

I am the theater parent who responded.

I think some parents do push their kids and some of us have kids who something is their passion.  I have 2 kids and one isn't like this and doesn't have a passion.  My other kid's passion is theater.  So do I enjoy every minute of all the time I've spent supporting her in this passion and the disruption to my own life at times?  No.  Am I proud of her and what she's doing?  Hell yes.  My kid is happy and thriving.

I guess I would ask you to ask yourself if you would do anything all that different.  If you have a child who wants to pursue something at a high level, yes it's going to cramp your style some.  But what kind of parent is not going to do that?[/quote]

NP - wait, isn’t part of the job of a parent to guide their child?  I get that many kids are passionate about their sport or activity of choice.  Great.  And, if a family’s finances and schedules permit these sports and activities to dominate their free time, super.  There are trade-offs in the form of kids becoming overly specialized at very young ages, some of which have been mentioned here, such as too much of a child’s identity being about one single thing.  I’ve also known coaches at higher levels (college and beyond) are aren’t particularly enthusiastic about travel sports for kids younger than high school, since the amount of time spent traveling could be used on things like additional skill development and conditioning.

Also, yes, there are choices about these things.  Not every high school requires years of travel sports to make a team.  [b]Not every opportunity must be taken, particularly if it’s going to create a schedule that leads to posts on here about how overwhelmed and exhausted parents are, and how they just can’t handle the logistics of these commitments.[/b]

OP, this issue is largely a class one.  UC/UMC families here aren’t going to forego these kinds of activities for their kids, no matter the trade-off.  It is what it is.[/quote]

Most posts, including OP's, seem to be parents upset their non-travel kids can't find kids to hang out with not parents of travel kids complaining about schedules [/quote]

Exactly. I don't understand the anger. Find friends with similar interests. Why do so many people care what other kids are doing on the weekends? You do you.

Plus, the birthday parties are too much. I'm tired. If I can find a reason to skip another birthday party where I need to sign and submit a waiver, I'll take it. We love the down time. We always attend for good friends, but the extended classmate birthday parties are unnecessary. [/quote]

+1 My kid has asked me to tell parents throwing a party that they have a game and can't attend. Small parties are great and my kid loves those, laser tag in 6th grade is just not a draw [/quote]

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