Reply to What is the taboo in 2023 about an unmarried, couple in a committed relationship having kids

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your relationship is more likely to end. And this is bad for the kids. This is the gist of it. I'm sure everyone will say "but we are so happy and I know married couples who are way more dysfunctional, blah blah"... but still, the truth is that it's crazy to commit to having a  child with someone when you wouldn't even commit to a relationship with them. A child is FAR more serious.[/quote]

This.

Every American couple I know who has done this has wound up breaking up.

[b]Scandinavians and Germans do it for life but they have a different social system and safety net[/b].[/quote]

There are also lower expectations for German and Scandinavian men in terms of providing for a family.  My Northern European friends wouldn’t remotely benefit from marriage.  They’d probably have to take on even more domestic responsibilities but not benefit financially.  It’s why there are such long parental leaves there.  Most couples have separate finances and you can’t have a baby if you’d earn $0 after the birth without a husband supporting you.  [/quote]

Germans are also far more responsible people than Americans, and German men are very involved fathers. If the relationship broke down then they would continue to provide for their kids out of a sense of obkigation.[/quote]

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