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[quote=Anonymous]Oh, yes. I love my parents very much. But now that I have an older child I can see that in many ways they were hands off, selfish, took the easy way out, and paid for problems to go away in ways that erased the problems for them but not me. I had one particular traumatic experience that was life changing for me, but because it was emotionally difficult for them, they ignored it and still sometimes refer to it in ways that are very very difficult for me to contend with: that's what gives me the most anger. I also struggle with one parent's anxiety having firm control over the other parent and can now see ways it impacted all of us negatively, and worry about the future (because I am less willing to be a scapegoat if I become a caretaker).

In the end though I do think they had good intentions and did their best in their own way, but I definitely try to do many things very differently. I am not dumb and know my own children will have their own opinions about me and their father. [/quote]

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