Reply to “Beach House” Early

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you don’t want to be with SIL why are you pretending it’s about the rooms?[/quote]

We would stay with them if the rooms were suitable. The difficulty is that explaining we don’t want our nephew unsupervised with our kids would kick off a huge and unnecessary family drama— we don’t care if he’s medicated/in therapy/doing sports, we aren’t risking our kids safety and it’s not up for discussion. 
[/quote]

So then why do you want them to ask for your input on the house if you never intend to stay there?  [/quote]

Because if it’s something that really matters to them we could do it for a couple of days with the right accommodations. [/quote]

Then, again some more--and how interesting that you haven't addressed this point--why don't you get on the stick and *proactively* send them links to places that would work for you, dates that would work for you, and an offer to pay your share if the houses that work for you are out their budget.[/quote]

You are really very hostile.

The reason I don’t proactively do so is that it’s entirely possible they are happy with how things are now, and don’t actually want my family to stay with them, and that they are being polite, which was the very question I put in my OP.[/quote]

For goodness' sake, what does it matter if they are being polite or if they don't actually want you there, if YOU are most comfortable staying in a hotel, and feel safer there? You cannot control their feelings or reactions, you can only do what works best for you and your family. You say on the one hand "we would stay with them if the rooms were suitable," and when I dare to suggest that you find a place with rooms suitable for you, you overreact. [/quote]

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