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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DD is stuck in a pattern in which at the beginning of a year or season, coaches are really excited about her attitude and potential. She works super hard, shows up with a positive but aggressive attitude every day, and is renlentless in trying to execute what the coaches ask her to do.

Unfortunately, after a couple of seasons in more than one sport with different coaches, I’ve noticed a pattern. As the season goes on, coaches’ attention gravitates to everyone but her. The main reasons I notice is that coaches give focused attention to girls who are behind in certain areas, and to girls who have behavioral problems/bad attitudes/slack off.

The recipients of the negative attention especially seem to bloom athletically. Worse yet, even when their attitudes or work ethic doesn’t change, the coaches just seem to eventually shrug it off since their performance improves with all of the extra attention. The girls who are behind benefit from the 1:1 attention and the coaches notice their progress since it’s so obvious.

On an objective basis, my daughter is consistently in the top 1/3rd of her teams skill-wise and athletically at the start of the season, and coaches always compliment her attitude and work ethic. But as the season progresses, she kind of disappears and the coaches forget about her. She loses playing time and eventually loses confidence. This has happened 3-4 times.

I think that because she isn’t a jerk or a superstar, but also isn’t totally struggling, it’s hurting her. Is there something about her attitude or mindset that she can work on to help the coaches “see” her?

What motivates a coach to invest in an athlete?[/quote]

OP I am sorry but it is you and your kid, not the others.

If your kid is not getting play time [b]that is because the other kids are better.[/b] Coaches are not playing those unruly kids to lose. They play what they consider the best to win.

Winning is the ticket and they don't think your kid has what it takes.

I am not trying to be mean. It's reality. Of course, there are some favorites on every time, however, you said this has happened more than once. A pattern...[/quote]

This is . . . . just not the case on many, many, MANY travel teams. Favorites, including relatives, are often played regardless of skill, attitude, etc. The entire travel thing (and HS teams that draw from those clubs) has been nauseatingly eye-opening on this point. [/quote]

My kids all six of them played on travel soccer & lax. Division 1 players in college for two of them. I know what I am talking about. [b]This is why any parent with a brain only has their kids join teams where the coaches are not parents or owned by one or two families. We purposely put one of ours on a "B' team to make sure they did not have a coach like you are describing.[b]
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While yes there were a few times a coach did this, mostly it was those jerk dad coaches. Life is not fair. OP in her statement said more than one time this has happened. That says to me her kid is not as good. It happens all the time little susie or johnny are not as good as mom or dad think.

[/quote]

Same. Maybe she isn't doing that though.

We purposely did external training and kept them on the second team or first team of tiny club throughout their developmental years (also because we are late growers in our family).

The payout really didn't start being seen until around age 16/17th, and then from there drastically so and better and better.

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