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[quote=Anonymous]FWIW, here's the two cents of a BTDT mother of 3 (currently expecting baby #4): You cannot favor one set of grandparents over the other. PERIOD. And despite the fact that YOU are the one who is physically dealing with the heaving lifting so to speak, you need to be sure to take your husband's feelings into consideration. I didn't really want an audience during my labor and delivery (other than my husband), but if folks wanted to come and hang out in the waiting room for the big announcement from DH, then that was fine with me. SUGGESTION: Tell folks they can hang out in the waiting room for the big announcement, but tell them -- and make sure your DH understands this -- that you don't want folks in the labor and delivery room. PERIOD.  Then tell everyone that you or your husband will call them when you are up for visitors at the hospital. You have to let the grandparents come visit the baby at the hospital.  Stagger the visits, and keep them short if you want to. I always call my folks/in-laws/siblings, etc. and say, "hey, feel like heading over to see the baby around Xpm? Would you mind stopping by Starbucks (or wherever) and bringing me X?"  I lined up visitors during the day and evening. Actually, I LOVED having my sisters take turns keeping me company at night while my husband went home to shower/shave/check on our other kids.  And you can orchestrate a similar schedule when you get home if you'd like --- although I highly recommend having folks around to help out (even if they need instructions). I tried to take it easy as much as possible when I got home from the hospital, so I spent most of the time in my room with the baby --- but I handed the baby off so I could shower, nap, eat, relax, etc. for short periods of time throughout the day, and this seem to make the grandparents feel useful and happy.  Then, when I had the baby, the grandparents usually helped clean up, do laundry, cook, etc. And that made my husband and I happy. Plus, you'll appreciate help early in the morning --- after you've been up all night with the baby.  Have the in-laws bring over coffee and bagels in the morning and pass off the baby while you and your husband nap and then shower.  Trust me, you'll appreciate the help (I can't wait until my in-laws come to visit once the new baby arrives).[/quote]

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