Reply to Who should help take care of MIL? A very complicated family dynamic.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think she needs professional caregivers.[/quote]

+1. And a full family discussion regarding the resources that will be needed to accomplish that. It's not fair to burden one child/IL with all the caregiving just because they didn't have children. [/quote]

Sounds like there’s plenty of resources to go around, and it’s not fair to just dump MIL on SIL1 because they can.

If I were SIL1 I, too, would be pissed at the bait and switch.

[b]I’m also annoyed by how much sexism there is baked into the premise that SIL2 should step up - she works full-time and has kids.  In any case it’s not anyone’s true responsibilities outside of FIL, who indeed is absconding on his obligations.[/b][/quote]

AMEN to this. The presumption that women's time and presence only exist for others is more than annoying to me. All of the SILs understand very well that MIL's own husband and sons are laying this burden at the feet of the women in this family instead of where it belongs - with the men who are legally and morally obligated to figure it out. I think SIL1 should go visit her own family for a good while and tell FIL he needs to work out caregiving. And obviously the house issue needs to be solved - BIL1 needs to man up and talk to his dad.

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