Reply to I made a huge mistake. Never should have Married DH. Now what?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "I made a huge mistake. Never should have Married DH. Now what?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If these are your worst examples, you are not ready to divorce. You likely need a marriage counselor to help you talk through all this.

If my MIL asked me about dinner, when I just had a baby, I would be annoyed beyond belief. But I wouldn’t cut her off.

Families have different norms about hospital stuff. My husband was surprised when I said I didn’t want family in the waiting room while I gave birth. He acquiesced, but it was very surprising to him. I was shocked when his family all came and sat around the hospital for 8 hours while our kid has brain surgery. It was not helpful to me in the slightest, but it meant a lot to my husband. Neither of us was right or wrong.

[b]It sounds like your husband actually does what you want. But then he takes some jabs at you about it. [/b]That isn’t cool and that is what you need to work on.[/quote]

Op here. You are right. He will generally do what I ask re: his family, but then I will hear about it for years later.
It is also very much communicated to his family that this is what I want, not what WE have decided works for us. He is just the messenger.
He reminded me this week that I was a b to his family, and that it was almost a dealbreaker to him and he contemplated leaving me.
I'm not going to be paraded into the town square for a flogging every year for the rest of our lives.[/quote]

So you have demands that he doesn't support regarding his family, and that he goes along with only to keep the peace, but then you also want him to take the fall for it with his family? Wowza. If you don't care for his family, or really care about them or what they think, why do you also need him to say it's his idea, too (when it obviously isn't)?[/quote]

I think it is important to be a united family front. Especially if its a topic that will be received negatively. For example, Hey mom and siblings, this is what we have decided works for us.
Versus, Hey mom and siblings, this is what Rita says she wants to do, So i'm just letting you know.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics