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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Good lord!  Some of you are awful.  You have no manners.  No sense of hospitality or how to treat visiting family.  OP.  Just ask your DIL and put her on the spot.

When I have visitors staying with me, I show them the coffee maker and tell them to make themselves at home.  I definitely do not leave them hanging.  So rude.  [/quote]

Op said dil told her to help herself. That's the opposite of leaving her hanging. [/quote]

DIL did NOT tell her until the morning she did not set up coffee.  You would be the first to tell OP that until told by DIL to.make herself at home if she had gone ahead and made coffee.

FWIW, working and a husband and children, I always set up coffee pot at night for next morning and told any visitors to feel free to make coffee if they got up early.

Family are still guests in my house.  Sad that most of you consider your family people to be endured and they probably feel the same about you.[/quote]
I don’t agree with a lot of the responses, but FWIW, I don’t want to be treated like a guest in someone’s house if I’m very close to them. I would not take the liberty unless invited to do so, but I prefer family to tell me to help myself rather than waiting for them to wait on or serve me. I don’t really feel comfortable with that dynamic. I would feel a little sad to be considered a guest in my kids’ houses.[/quote]

You will be a guest in their homes, so be mindful of that and don’t overstep. My ILs had to learn the hard way that no, you don’t get to barge in, enter any roo at any time, do whatever you want whenever you want. No, you don’t get to literally go through my closets, find a gift for someone else, and open it, MIL.[/quote]

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