Reply to Question for the smart girls who snag the good guys early in life

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We teach women they don't need to even start getting serious about men until their early 30s. By then, a single 32-year-old man is looking for a woman in her 20s.

We can mock the women who settled down in their early 20s as not being modern, ambitious, independent, motivated, or smart. Women are told that making marriage a priority in her 20s makes her a loser.

Then she gets into her 30s and says "I'm ready to settle down" and she can't find anyone.

A woman who makes marriage a priority at age 23 is sort of a rebel today. Seriously. She is going against the grain of her peers, bucking the message society keeps sending her and doing the opposite.

Maybe it's the message society is sending you?

[/quote]
I'm a repeat poster on here, married to a "boring" but great guy.. I would never tell my DD to get serious at 23.   Ever.   I would discourage it.  Neither of my nieces got serious at 23. They were still trying to figure out their careers, and grow up themselves.  My sister got married at 23, and she regrets it to this day. She told her DDs (my nieces) to not get married so young.

You can find nice guys in your late 20s, early 30s, but they won't be that unicorn:  good looking, makes a lot of money, good partner/father, and faithful.   If you manage to find this unicorn, you are supremely lucky.  But, most guys, and most people for that matter, don't have the entire package. And if a woman is waiting for that whole package, more than likely, she'll be waiting for a very very long time.

That doesn't mean you have to settle, but it does mean your expectations should be realistic.

I snagged my good guy when I was 30.  [/quote]

The vast majority of friends, acquaintances, and family members I know who married in their 20s divorced. The vast majority of us who waited until our 30s are still married. I was such a different person at 25/26 from who I was at 30. I'm glad I had the chance to experience a lot before settling down and I think I valued myself more because of it. For women being in a relationship often degrades their self confidence so I would never encourage young marriages. You can always tell the women who did this.

I felt like I had a lot of choices of nice guys to date seriously in my 30s but I worked in a very male dominated area. Where you work can have a huge impact on your potential partners. [/quote]

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