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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would not pay for my parents’ assisted living. My first responsibility is to my children and ensuring my own retirement. My father ended up in a nursing home after a stroke. I got him into one near me that takes Medicaid and started the spend-down process. He ran out of money after only 2 months and the facility applied for Medicaid. He was approved. I visit often because he’s close by and drive him to medical appointments. My HHI is about 500,000 and there is no way that I would spend that on assisted living when he qualifies for government assistance. I owe it to my children to not saddle them with such a burden or choice when I’m old.[/quote]

$500K hhi and you too selfish to help your dad out?   Do you ever wonder what your father did for you?[/quote]

I know what he did. He retired early with a 7 figure nest egg, left my mom, moved to another country and started a new family there. Bought a house for a woman and paid their living expenses. He came back to the US when his health started to fail and medical care in that country was not very good. Only he came back to the US with very little money left due to being scammed by the woman he met there. He needs a skilled nursing facility so I did all the work to find a nice place for him that would eventually take Medicaid. He self-paid until he ran out of assets and then the facility applied for Medicaid for him. He pays most of his social security to the facility and the state pays the rest. He is well-cared for. I still spend hours a week visiting, coordinating medical care, taking him outside, bringing him food, etc. I am going above and beyond for him with my time for him. It’s not like I left him on the street or dumped him in a disgusting home and abandoned him.[/quote]

Unless he abused you or orders (physically or sexually) you need to do more.  His relationship with others including 
Your mother or his poor financial acumen does not warrant your mindset.  Have a heart. [/quote]

More? In what way? I work full-time and have my own family to take care of. I see him 3-4 times a week and take him out to see family several times a month. I set him up with my Netflix, cell phone plan, manage his finances and medical appointments, advocate for him at his facility, etc. These things take a lot of time.[/quote]

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