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[quote=Anonymous]I'm also a single mom with a toddler debating this question.  I was an only child and wished I had a sibling growing up. (As an adult it is easier to see the financial advantages of being an only.)

My child is very social and loves other children and babies. Her daycare teacher said she would be a great older sister and I agree (they have told me she "mentored" a younger kid who joined the classroom - showing him the ropes.) Hopefully she would like her sibling (and vice versa)  and they could play together.

Problem is there is no guarantee siblings will get along or support each others as adults - BUT as an older parent I do like the idea that she will still have someone who is family when I am gone, someone to share the burdens of dealing with an aging me (hopefully I can set things up to spare her most of this).

Probably not applicable to you - but she is double donor conceived and I have a second embryo. If she is someone for whom genetics are important than this sibling would be a full genetically related family member.

Disadvantages - single mom with no other family so resources must be shared and inevitably there will be less time and money.  The resource issue is the one thing that is holding me back.  That being said I am looking at jobs and various geographical locations so there are ways of expanding financial resources and with enough money outsourcing time consuming things that could provide more time an attention for two kids.  Previously I had said I wouldn't do two without a partner (but then I also said I wouldn't do one without a partner) but am definitely seriously considering changing my mind about that.

One reason that I did IVF with donor egg add on is that I knew I wanted two kids and I would be lucky with IVF to get one of my own.   I do worry about things like what if the pregnancy was twins, or what if my health were endangered (high risk because of age)   It's different risking health when you are single than when you are the only parent of someone who needs you.  Also if child were special needs that would be super super hard.

Ultimately you have the child for you but hope your child will benefit as well. 
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