Reply to If you are married to a big law partner, how involved are they in your family's home life?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DH is a big law partner. Three kids under four. He's with us 6:30-7:30 am (gets the kids up and helps with breakfast). Then 5:45-7:15. Eats diner with us every night and does bath for the older kids. Spends most of the weekend hands on unless he has a call.

He makes this work by doing a ton at night after bedtime and working o during nap time on the weekend. He also will routinely handle doctors appointments, is always there for the first day of school etc.

Partnership offers much more flexibility. We will never take a vacation where he doesn't need to work, but he is able to have a lot of say over his schedule, much more so than when he was an associate. 
 In terms of mental load, I'd say it's 70% me, maybe less though. This is because I have high expectations of him as a father and spouse and don't put up with a lot of bs excuses. He needs to be present mentally and emotionally for our kids, that's not negotiable. I wouldn't have married and had three kids with someone who didn't prioritize that though. [/quote]

I am a previous poster who also has a big law partner for a husband and 3 kids.  Does your DH have outside interests?  Does he do anything other than work and be with the family?[/quote]

No. That's actually been a point of contention with us, I have encouraged him to spend more time on himself to avoid burnout but it's a battle. He does see friends for drinks and will smoke pot and watch sports on Saturday nights haha. Hopefully in a few years he can have more time to himself but for right now he prioritizes family time and I'm very grateful for that. [/quote]

Wow. Your first post and this one are exactly like my family dynamic. I too refuse to live in a situation where he can’t be available for family. If that was the case I’d demand he quit. And he doesn’t have a lot of outside interests either, but I wish he did. I wish he would quit but of course this is what he wants and with the time he is investing in his family I can accept that. [/quote]

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