Reply to I regret having kids. I don't like being a mom. And it's affecting my marriage

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Reply to "I regret having kids. I don't like being a mom. And it's affecting my marriage"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, can you talk to your husband about each of you working in some solo vacations, even if it's just you staying in a hotel in Annapolis or Georgetown or somewhere else "staycation-y" for two nights? And then he can go on a ski weekend with his friends or something?

I take at least one girls' trip a year, and I sometimes go to weddings by myself while DH stays home with the kids. (I happen to get invited to a lot of graduate student weddings, and it's fun to bop to those and not worry about buying a second plane ticket for DH or securing child care.) Those little trips where I can Just Be Me make a big difference. And if you can frame it as he gets some time to himself or with his friends, too, that might be progress.

And don't be too hard on yourself. My mom was a great mom-of-me-as-a-little-kid, and started not knowing what to do with us as we got older and left the house. It's like she was only good at early childhood parenting. She's a massive pain to deal with as an adult sometimes. So you might not be the most cookie-baking, pretend-play mom now, but maybe you'll be a great mom of teens/young adults/adults, and that is where you'll hit your stride!  [/quote]

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