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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Resurrecting this thread since my question is very similar to OP's. DH tries but loses interest / goes soft. We have elementary age kids so it's not like we're in the thick of the early years any more. I'll suggest a hormonal workup and cardio checkup (he has occasionally had episodes of high blood pressure in the past) but if those come back clean, what's the answer? I'm very fit, 45, he's 43. I don't think I can live like this for the next 10-15 years. :/[/quote]

If it's just that he goes soft, it's ED which is not uncommon by mid-40s. Easily solvable by taking Viagra or Cialis.

If he's not interested in sex, that's a bigger issue. Range of reasons why, but only your DH knows. Not so easily solvable.[/quote]

Thank you. (And the other PPs) He says he's interested but sometimes it feels like he's just going through the motions.[/quote]

Ask would he please "just go through the motions" on the basis that it's important to you? 
Plenty of things in a marriage are this way: visiting in laws, hearing (for the 1000 time) about that annoying person from work, etc
Sex is not different. When something is important to your partner, that makes it important to you.[/quote]

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