Reply to How do you deal when you hate having a dog?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m sending my husband this thread. He’s always had dogs growing up and has been trying for years to get me to agree to get one. I don’t like the way dogs smell, I don’t want to be waking up to walk a dog in darkness and cold and bad weather, I don’t want dog hair all over my house and things, and I pretty much only like dogs from afar. He’s convinced I will fall in love once we get one but I truly think I will end up in OP’s shoes. [/quote]

OP here. Yup, that's exactly my issue - I hate going out in the cold, the dog hair is so out of control I have to vacuum daily (and we got a "non-shedding" breed), my house smells. The groomers where we live have a 2-3 month wait, so I've been learning how to groom her myself, which is time-intensive. I spent 1.5 hours brushing and cutting her hair yesterday (plus another 30 minutes of cleaning up).

I also just hate the little annoying things, like when I'm trying to work and she starts whining for attention. We ignore it like the trainers say to do, but it still happens. Also hate that I have to spend an hour a day training, I knew there would be some training but it's a LOT. Every walk I have to be 100% focused on training, when I just want to zone out and walk. [/quote]

I think the problem is that you have assigned yourself to be the primary caretaker.  Back off a bit.  Require your spouse/kids to groom the dog.  Require your spouse/kids to walk the dog.  Require your spouse/kids to vacuum the house.  Voila!  No more hate.[/quote]

My guess is if there is already this much work/mental lifting inequality, there is not going to be a "Voila!" moment. Expecting people to just change and do what you want them to do is naive and a recipe for disappointment and resentment. If OP "backs off", then the dog doesn't get walked enough and has accidents, has behavioral problems because it isn't trained, and then OP is still tired and worn out but now with an even bigger problem.

Parents in these situations need to balance the current home workloads before adding something as enormous as a dog. All kids must be doing their own chores. Spouse must be doing half the chores/finances/driving kids to activities/meal planning and cooking/ etc. Only THEN can you add a dog.[/quote]

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