Reply to Should I excuse DH from nighttime duties?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would talk to your husband about what he thinks. At 4 weeks old, I wasn’t yet pumping and I had to do all the nighttime feeds. It did not make sense for my husband to get up. I also was able to sleep or rest when the baby did during the day. If you are not able to do so, that is a totally different matter.

I guess the question is what does he do now during the night and will both of you be negatively impacted if this changes.

When my oldest was that age my husband was working in person and I was not yet pumping. There was literally nothing he could offer middle of the night. We did the late/early shift. He is naturally a night person. He stayed up until late and I slept early. I did the two middle of the night feedings. When I started back to work at 9 weeks pp, my baby was sleeping until 6am without waking. On the nights that he did wake, we took turns. It worked out fine.[/quote]

Either you’re a liar or had the world’s easiest baby. They’re “literally nothing” your DH could do to help? Your baby never needed to be changed, burped, re-swaddled, or be put to sleep?

I detest people like you who view doing it all themselves as a badge of honor that other new moms should strive for, when really it’s an unfortunate lifestyle born out of a crappy support system. There’s a reason many breastfeeding moms use night nannies (or take help from their DHs or other family members)[/quote]

Whoah! I’m sorry you are so offended and had a different experience. My first was a terrible sleeper / had jaundice / had trouble gaining weight. My husband did all the laundry, made meals, washed every pump part and bottle, wrote thank you notes for baby presents - but he didn’t get up at night. He did stay up until 12am so I could sleep 8pm-12am in one chunk. My 2nd baby was much easier until 4-5 mo old and then he was up multiple times until he was 2. My husband is a grump when he doesn’t get sleep - I handle it better. We all do what works for us - and for me that meant never waking him at night unless there is vomit or some huge poop blow out and I need help. My husband did have lots of things he could do to help, just not between 12am and 6am. [/quote]

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