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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]I'm in a social group with four other couples.[/b] The men hang out regularly, as do the women, and sometimes in a group. However, there's one woman out of the group with whom I'm not especially close, but we get along well when we see each other in these larger settings.

Last weekend, I asked these friends to hang out and everyone was busy but didn't say doing what.

Then my husband saw the guy "group" last night, and men being men and having no clue about social stuff, were open about the fun their wives had at this woman's birthday party. I guess she had a dinner at an outdoor restaurant and invited every woman in the group except me (and a few other women outside this group came too).

I am really pretty hurt. I'm inclusive and friendly. Would it have killed her to invite me? It just feels like a weird slight, especially as I include her in every group thing, and we all hang out as couples as well.

What would you think and how would you feel? I cannot tell if I'm being babyish or if I'm right to feel miffed.[/quote]

I think the issue here is thinking of yourselves as a fixed group where every event is a package deal. Maybe the other woman doesn't it see it that way. She might have seen it as having friends that she sees in different settings and when it came to her birthday she wanted to invite her close friends from all different settings. I've had this happen where I'm in a "group" where there are people that think that everyone needs to be a part of every gathering and they get annoyed if two families get together instead of all four families. Or if two couples hang out with a different couple outside of the group. But in my case there were two couples that were friendly but not really good friends so it didn't always make sense to force everyone together for the sake of making sure the whole group is together. I would move away with only hanging out as a group and either start mixing others in at the events where you host or doing one-off things with individuals to build a stronger relationship. [/quote]

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