Reply to Would it bother you if your husband wanted to be buried beside his first wife and child?

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Reply to "Would it bother you if your husband wanted to be buried beside his first wife and child?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hard for me to formulate an answer, because I just can't understand caring at all.  When you're dead you're dead.  Even if you believe in some sort of afterlife, your body is just a corpse.  Burial itself seems odd to me.  But I appreciate other people feel differently.

As you what it says about the relationship, I don't think too much.  There is no right answer here.  A second wife, assuming a widower, is not inherently any better or worse than a first wife, right?  Or more loved?  So either way someone this man was deeply in love with and shared a life with is "alone."  If the second wife would be upset, why wouldn't the first?  (Of course, that is absurd, but the whole premise is that feelings can somehow be hurt after death?)  [/quote]

This.  All these people saying that wanting to be buried with his first wife means he never loved or valued his second wife -- well, doesn't wanting to be buried with his second wife mean he never loved or valued his first wife?  Isn't that awful, too?  If the first spouse died, especially if the first spouse and child both died, I would imagine that's a trauma and a grief that lingers.  I wouldn't assume that my husband didn't ever really love me, or value me, or care about me, just because he wanted to be buried next to his first spouse, assuming she died and they didn't divorce.  [/quote]

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