Reply to "the victim of the affair is not always the victim of the marriage"

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Reply to ""the victim of the affair is not always the victim of the marriage""

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]That is very 2015 thinking. Psychologist have done much research since.

Marriages are an agreement between 2 adult parties unless it is an arranged marriage or if one is being held hostage.

Affairs are not and agreement between 2 people.

It is not reasonable to blame somebody for their spouses actions and is a kin to saying: "I wouldn't hit her if she wasn't such a B*tch" or "I drink because he is such a jerk".

People need to take responsibility for their own actions. If the marriage sucks end it. But... but... but... I don't want to, plain and simple. [b]For the kids,[/b] for the money, for selfishness. It's a choice to stay married. It's a breach of an agreement to have an affair.  [/quote]

I agree but I think when it comes to kids, it's not so black and white. Cheating occurs when the marriage is over (usually both to blame), why punish the kids too. I do have empathy when kids are involved, the only true victims.[/quote]

No cheating does not happen when the marriage is over.

Being honest and not staying married to a toxic person is best for the kids. If you can’t leave the house change rooms, get separated. [/quote]

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