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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Just found out about my husband's second affair"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]me too second affair. Too mention I seperated no help two years with two kids. Get out now if he has temper problems kid in picture will make him cheat, lie, and be more aggresive. Being a single mom SUCKS.....GET OUT NOW. So here is what I'm doing he cheated immediatly after I forgave 3 weeks into reconcilliation cheating full fledge love you's sex ect. I played it cool. Other than when I can't sleep I took a pillow to him and wwf pillow wake up call. Anyhow, I told him I need time. I moved from AZ to TX left my job, home sold my rv left my belongings. With two kids to end our separation of almost 3 yrs from his previous affair. He begged, pleaded his love, promised, promised and promised. My kids begged, everyone thought I should come back. So I forgave 100% and put my and my kids well being in his hands. HUGE MISTAKE. shoulda followed my gut. Anyhow here I am away from family, friends, his terf, no job, place in his name, kids new to school and putting all the risk in for my family unit. For him to threaten to kick us out when I caught him and said anything at all. So HERE IS THE ADVISE. I love my husband been 10 yrs. My supposed best friend. NOT..... Anyone who loves you and knows they are hurting you and continues to do so, they don't love you, FIRST, it is a POWER TRIP, CONTROL ANGLE and a game nothing more. HERE IS an option if you are dependant. Tell him you are hurt, need time to regain self esteem. Take that time to stay busy on you. SO BUSY THAT YOU BEARLY SEE HIM AT ALL. LLegit excuse to not get manipulated. make him pay bills and take care of everything, while you get a GOOD ENOUGH JOB to pay real bills, save money, find a place, set it up, set yourself up with self esteem, friends, financially, emotionally, spiritually and physically oh and LEGALLY. WITHOUT HIM KNOWING THAT IS YOUR INTENT. If your busy time will fly and before you know it youll be independant. If you do not want a divorce seperate to with a clear mind and confidence make the big "D" choice. PLEASE always keep your independance...................... You will fall in love with you and you can make yourself happy...OH FYI... he sounds tempermental if he gets angery I wouldn't let him know what your plan is AT ALL, still be nice just tell him your tired, or been busy whatever it takes. Plus don't let him know where you get your place, when your moving, or anything about your new activities that he can use to find, get revenge or use in divorce, leave a letter, but get yourself set up if you can handle a month or two of avoiding him to do so. It sounds as if you should even consider a restraining order. (you can get at court house) I am sure you don't think he could get that bad, but divorce, seperation and jealousy make some men very very dangerous, and it is never expected. BE CAREFUL. LEAVE, he sounds abusive, and it could easily get so much worse. ASK YOURSELF who do you love more him or yourself?[/quote] um..what?[/quote] Since you seem confused: she took the time to try to write and help someone. And you, DCUM sister, took the time to try to make her feel stupid. Understand now? [/quote]
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