Reply to Family pressure for son’s name

Forum Index » Expectant and Postpartum Moms

Reply to "Family pressure for son’s name"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Putting the naming tradition aside, I think Hani is a perfectly fine name.  He is not going to get teased at school. Kids today are simply not like that. They are excepting of different ideas and cultures much more than we were a generation ago.  So that part will be completely fine.  Also, there are many cultures where naming after the family patriarch is a big thing and passed down from generation to generation. For example, it is a very big thing with the sephardic jews (Jews of Middle Eastern descent).  [b]Not giving your child the name Hani it’s going to offend your in-laws. And I don’t mean just a little bit. This is going to be a massive offense.  Whatever dynamic you have with them now it’s going to be forever changed.  If your in-laws are reasonable people though maybe things will not be that bad. Only you know that.[/b] None of us on the Internet to know that about your family.   I’m not saying this to pressure you into doing something you don’t want to do, I’m letting you know what the consequences are going to be. However, you and your husband really need to sit down and come up with a plan. You both need to be on the same page. For example, if you go with the naming tradition, then he forgot some thing else and goes with a tradition from your family for the second child let’s say.  Or, maybe the children are raised studying your religion instead of his.[/quote]

Yep this.[/quote]

If anyone is going to throw a tantrum and cut me off because of what I chose to name *my* child, then good riddance to them. I don’t need that drama in my life.

Sorry, but adults who act like toddlers don’t get a say in how I live my life. I am too damn old and tired to deal with that crap. And I don’t care about the cultural aspect, not respecting boundaries is not respecting boundaries, period.[/quote]

See this is what you don’t understand. Western culture is very individualistic. With Middle Eastern culture the family is central and paramount. Neither is better but it’s two different ways of seeing the world. I’m Arab and no matter how annoying my in laws can be there is no way I can say either it goes my way or good riddance to them. It’s all about compromise and accommodation. There are positives and negatives with this - on the one hand, the family unit is strong. That means we are never alone and there are ppl who are there for us through thick and thin. Even if we don’t really click with each other personality wise we will always be there for each other in times of need. The negatives are many as well - ppl up in your business, thinking they should have a say in decisions that are personal. With this I try to find a balance cuz obviously I also want to live my life the way I want to. OP’s problem here isn’t here in laws but her husband who wants to continue the tradition. She needs to figure it out with him and they need to come to a decision together over what they want to do. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics