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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Wife here. I am in my 40s. My libido is through the roof.

You mentioned resentment. I think honestly it is easier after so many years to fantasize about someone with whom you don’t have the daily grind and friction. Three kids is a lot, she is probably overwhelmed mentally. How much are you around with the kids?

Re: not opening the marriage — you seem to have strong feelings about that. My husband and I have discussed it and although I don’t know what that would look like, I’m not completely opposed as I might have been at one point. For one thing I don’t think I would leave my husband. But different relationships bring different life perspectives. Maybe things feel stagnant after a while with the same person because you need to grow as individuals.[/quote]

NP.  Deep into our 40s.  After me  dropping hints, my DH of over 15 years took up my suggestion to open the marriage for a bit.  Got it out of my system (with a somewhat younger guy on the periphery of our friend group) and all is good and hot now.[/quote]

Did your husband get to take advantage of his temporary freedom? 
Did you go off with this other person privately or was this a collaborative with your H? 
Any regrets?
Why did you stop?

[/quote]

He did not, although he was welcome to do so.  Not a collaborative session. No regrets, and I stopped because I got it out of my system (and the other guy was fine with this).  Now, to be fair, this worked in our circumstances.  Did my open minded DH get jealous?  Yes, I think so.  But that jealousy sparked things up between us and it’s lasting.  Might not work for everyone, of course. We had had talks, off and on, about whether monogamy was natural.  [/quote]

How long ago did you do this? Were you with the other person just once or was it a longer term thing? Did you just come home and announce that you were closing up or did your husband indicate that he didn’t want you going out anymore? After being with a new person after such a long time with your husband did it make you more or less into having sex with your husband? Did your husband want to know the details or was he oblivious to when and how you were getting with the new girl/guy?[/quote]

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