Reply to How hard are the teen years, really?

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[quote=Anonymous]My older two are college aged now. I loved the teen years with them. DD had patches of anxiety here and there when dealing with mean girls and MS social dynamics, and there were a couple sports team dramas, but I can’t actually think of any negative or difficult behavior from her. She was and is brilliant, funny, independent, kind, had a great group of similar friends in HS and now college, and she never drank or engaged in other risky behaviors.

DH and I have different views on how easy our older DS was as a teen. He was somehow born thinking he should be in charge of the house, and he and DH have butted heads many times through the years. I truly did sometimes feel like I was watching a nature program with two alphas battling to take over the pack. DS caused me a fair amount of anxiety because his group of popular friends were much more into partying than DD’s staid group. We had many conversations about the dangers of alcohol starting when he came home from homecoming drunk as could be, and I worried every time he went to a party. Fortunately, he had an extremely demanding sports schedule—he’s playing D1 now—and so only went to a fraction of the parties the wildest in his group did. I think his drive to succeed in his sport made him buckle down in school and helped keep him away from drugs and vaping. It’s shocking to me how many of his friends did both.

We feel lucky given that many of our friends’ teens dealt with much more serious issues, including suicidal depression, anorexia, severe ADHD, severe OCD, addiction, and bipolar disorder. We have our fingers crossed that our tween will stay safe and healthy. He’s generally delightful, but man is this kid ever stubborn and argumentative. Not a surprise given that DH and I were very much the same way growing up, but it has made me more sympathetic to my parents. [/quote]

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