Reply to Please be gentle/positive: 8 year age gap

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Honestly, your 8 yo should be really engaged in her own life -- school, activities, friends - and the new baby doesn't need to change her existence that much.  Maybe only one parent can come to some of her events instead of two, but that's fine.  And yes, reminder, you are the parent and you make the decisions.  Your 8 yo has NO VOTE on whether or not you are going to expand your family.  [/quote]

And the parents have NO VOTE of their son daughter likes their sibling or if the siblings get along and become best friends.[/quote]
I don't understand this thinking. This is how you end up with siblings that don't like each other. No, they don't have to be best friends, but as parents you are 100% in control of the family culture. And my family culture is that your family, including (especially) your siblings are THE most important thing in your life. You love them above all and treat them best because they are your lifelong family.

Both my parents are one of four. One is best friends with their siblings and speaks to them every day. The other can't stand them. Having witnessed it, it 100% came down to my grandparents and their parenting style. Don't foster an environment of competition, don't play favorites, don't intervene in their conflict, hammer home that they are family and they need to be there for each other. [/quote]

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