Reply to I’m happy being a SAHM, except when others talk about it like I’m some kind of sucker

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Reply to "I’m happy being a SAHM, except when others talk about it like I’m some kind of sucker"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I agree 100% with you, OP. I don't think other posters are right that you're reading into it. There is the assumption in the democratic party that women are only SAHM's when they are forced into it/duped into it, and all women would be better off if they were working.

I am also very happy that I became a SAHM, but yes, it does get depressing when people in power are always suggesting that I'm dumb/victim of the patriarchy/stuck in a role, etc. It's just depressing to be looked down on.

It was so refreshing when Andrew Yang spoke positively about his SAH wife in the debates.

I honestly went to a therapist about a year after having my first child to ask her if she could tell me whether or not I was fooling myself that I liked being a SAHM. She said that it used to be that women had to stay home, and now the pendulum has swung the other way and all women feel forced to be a working mom. Her focus was actually child psychology (it just happened that she was the closest therapist to me) and she was really supportive of me staying home and told me she sees a lot of kids in her practice who have problems because their parents are too focused on theri big careers.

I also think another thing being totally ignored is that there are so many women out there who would love to stay home with their babies but can't because they have to go back to work. [b]To me, it borders on inhumane that we live in a society where some women are forced to be separated from their babies just to be able to afford basic necessities[/b]. I think that's the real tragedy, not someone who has to spend the day with their baby (the horror!) when they would prefer to be working. I don't know why we don't talk about this more.[/quote]

WOW.  You need to visit some other countries (not just the rich vacation countries, or the rich resort parts of poor countries) and find out what "inhumane" treatment actually is, because having to have gainful employment as an adult while your child is in childcare for part of the day at most 5 days a week is NOT it.[/quote]

I do think it is inhumane how many women are forced by economic circumstances and terrible workplace policies to return to work within 2 weeks of giving birth. There may be women who are happy with that arrangement but it's not typical and for most women, that is a wrenching position to be in. Not to mention that many women have still not recovered from childbirth fully by 14 days later, and that the jobs most likely to require an early return often are jobs that require people to be on their feet for long periods of time or doing physically arduous labor. Yes, that is inhumane. The fact that there are more inhumane conditions elsewhere in the world does not negate that fact. Plus, you really want to compare the US, the actual richest country in the world, to the worlds poorest countries and then pat ourselves on the back because we aren't doing as poorly as counties dealing with widespread poverty, violent conflict, famine, and disease? That's embarrassing. It is proper to compare the policies in the US to nations like the UK, Germany, Japan, and other wealthy nations because those are more similarly situated countries.

(Also, guess what -- a lot of poor countries still have more humane policies towards pregnant women and families because they are  not obsessed with corporate and shareholder profits. That doesn't mean they don't have other problems, but it's actually incredibly unusual in the world to have no guaranteed maternity leave for working women. The US really is backwards in this respect.)[/quote]

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