Reply to Seeing OPP (other people’s parenting) up close

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here. Ok only 3.5 more days to go! They leave Tuesday mid day.

A lot of the suggestions here seem to be along the lines of trying to “help” my sister be better. I’m telling you it’s not possible. [b]The only way to have a relationship with her is to play by her rules (she once cut me off for 5 years, I’ve only been back in her good graces for the last 2 years).
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I fully accept that it is what it is and I’m a firm believer that, unless someone’s doing something that CPS needs to know about, then they get to do whatever they want with their kids.

I think I’m just trying to figure out how to survive the next 80 hours (not that anyone’s counting haha.....). I like the suggestions of just doing my own thing with my own kids.

Her DH is just a shell of a human. He’s miserable. He does whatever she says. I don’t think he agrees with her (or at least not to the extremes she goes to), but he does whatever she says. I actually have very little direct interaction with him as she doesn’t like him coordinating plans without her being present.

Part of what’s making things hard is just being around my sis and her DH and the way they are just constantly fighting and screaming at their kids. Like they are all sweet and “ok baby” to each other but then they run out of patience and lose their sh1t on each other or their kids 10 times a day.[/quote]

Seriously, where is your self-respect?  Why did you allow this?  Why are you tippy-tapping around her (she cut you off for five YEARS and you just let her stroll back on into your life and then you worry about whether or not you're in her "good graces?" WTF?)?  She sounds manipulative.

I don't say that to be harsh, OP, but to say that you deserve better, and chances are good that if she's this disordered, there's some part of genetic component of it and/or significant issues in your upbringing, and they could be affecting you too, even if you don't realize it.  Also, you don't have to eat sh*t from people just because you happen to share DNA.  Set some firm boundaries for yourself and your family that this will be the last time you ever allow this in your home.
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