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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, how many children to you have, how old are they, any of them married, and insight if they are choosing to be childless? [/quote]

This is a good question.  I see that OP is in pain, but her anger comes through very strongly.  She may alienate her children even if she thinks she is holding back and being careful.  I would see a therapist.  Whether your kids eventually procreate you want to maintain ties.  I’m not sure my mom realizes how her years of complaining about how I wasn’t interested in kids soured things even after I started a family.  And she believed she was holding her tongue, too.[/quote]

1. I'm not  your mother. 
2. Reread above.  I have never once, not once, said anything. Yes, I'm  sure they know I would love grandchildren because they know me, not because  I believe I was holding my tongue when I wasn't.  
3. Additionally,  I've been more than vocal about my own mother's lack of choices in the 1950s, which,  in my opinion, would  have  resulted  in her never having kids. 
4. I have not alienated my kids. In fact, many  of **their**  child bearing friends have alienated them, which they actually feel comfortable enough to share with  me. And-they are sad about that.  Different life paths. **Talk about holding my tongue.

That being said, it is ridiculous to assume that each reaction to a situation can't  be mutually exclusive. Just as no one can or should judge you for your decision to have or not have kids, there shouldn't be judgement regarding the impact of  that  either.  Each  will have their  own emotions.

But, odd that you did, despite  indicating for so long that you wouldn't,  have kids. So something must  have changed your mind (?)[/quote]

You're right, you're not angry or bitter or rude at all.  The acceptance and grace is oozing off you.  What a quirk of fate that you are not bring nudged into this matriarchial seat of benevolence and admiration.  Good luck!  
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