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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Vomit. Sure you can because instead of paving your own way you're still relying on your parents.[/quote]

This is ridiculous. OP can pay her own way - what she is asking about is whether she can afford to pay a house that is big enough for her family AND her mother.  She probably can without her mother's contribution.

However, if I had to buy a house that could accommodate my mother - my mother would have to pay her own way and contribute to the down payment and mortgage.   That's just reality. Although my mother came from nothing - she worked hard, saved and at this point in time is wealthier than I am.   This is not my situation, but I could see if my father died my mother wanting to come and live with me. The only way that could happen is if I moved to a significantly larger space (and my mother's living standards at this point in her life are a lot higher than mine.)  Any money transfer that makes this possible is not a disgusting wealth transfer or about my not being able to pay my way (I'm perfectly happy in my 500sqft apartment but even if I squeezed an extra bed for her that would not be good enough for a variety of reasons) but rather a retirement choice that she would be making and it is reasonable for her to use her assets to do so.

It's bizarre to me this insistence on everyone maintaining a separate household  versus pooling resources as a family to meet the needs of everyone.  My uncle and aunt lived with my grandparents their whole lives.  Not sure how household expenses were divided but my uncle who worked in construction made improvements to the house, etc.  I'm sure both my uncle and grandparents benefited from the arrangement at different times in their lives.  My uncle probably benefiting more when he was younger and starting a family and my grandparents when they were older since my aunt (in law) ended up doing arrangements for in home care, etc.

Bottom line is the OP can afford it, particularly if she lives reasonably frugally. Even if she ran into hard times (loss of income, mother needing expensive care.) she has considerable savings as a cushion. It's likely she will also have a good inheritance (even if taxed) so an emergency dipping into savings (if at all needed)  is unlikely to hurt her retirement at the end of the day.

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