Reply to Changing the name of an internationally adoped child

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Are you serious?
[b]Adopting is a selfish thing. You do it because you want a child of your own. It is about the a-parents selfish needs[/b]The neighbors do not need to place that family on a pedestal because they adopted, and the adoptee does not need to feel grateful for them for adopting her[/quote]

This is really funny given the fact that people are always telling people who try IVF that they are selfish and they should "just adopt" because it is the unselfish thing to do.  Damned if you do, damned if you don't. [/quote]
Adopting is done for selfish reasons. You want a child that is your own. That has no other parents and no links to any other family. Nobody adopts because they want to give a child a home. They adopt because a child is what they want. Children are placed in adoption have homes, but the adoptive home is supposed to be better.

Sometimes the adoptive home is not better. If the family is so intent on changing the name of a 7 year old, then they hardly received any pre-adoption counseling, or thought about how the child will feel later on in life.
I really doubt that changing the name if the child is the one and only parenting mistake they will ever make.
And do not compare bio parents to adoptive parents. The adoptive parents would not even have the child if it was 'in the beginning' believed that they would be able to give a better home. [/quote]

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