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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Also a transplant but I agree with PP. Transplants prioritize other things (career, prestige, money) over family. People who really prioritize family are back in Ohio (or wherever). It’s a little gross and something I’ve had to come to accept about myself. [/quote]
Very very very few people are going to be remembered for their job performance.  Many more will be remembered for being a loving and dedicated mom, dad, brother, sister, etc.  If you disappear today, you will easily be replaced at work by someone doing the job to to the same level as you.  You are irreplaceable as a mother, father, sister, brother...  
Priorities.[/quote]

Wow, there’s a huge number of assumptions happening here.

My husband and I both moved to the DC area for work. We have a loving family and are very happy. My parents live in NY and my in-laws live in AZ, so there was no world in which we would all be together in one town.

Not everyone is from a small town where it’s possible to have your entire family together, unless you decide to be a heartless bitch and leave them. [/quote]

If I lived in the town I was born in, I could see my own aunts & uncles regularly, my cousins and their kids, etc etc. While we couldn’t be close to my husband’s family as well (he’s from a foreign country) we could do a lot more to center family. We have chosen not to for valid reasons. But I do find it odd that we gloss over what transplants have forsaken. [/quote]

Not all transplants have forsaken the same thing. My parents live in NY. My sister lives in CA. DH’s family lives in AZ.

Why are you generalizing? Your situation is not everyone’s situation. [/quote]

I’m not generalizing. There are multiple people in this thread. But as a phenomenon, we don’t talk about it, which I find odd, given the scope of the transplant phenomenon. We have for example Kevin Williams talking about the upsides of being a transplant and being critical of those who don’t do it. But not much on the family costs on being a transplant.

Probably because the journalistic class is made of unapologetic transplants. [/quote]

You still aren’t getting it.

If your family is spread across the country, then there’s no “family” cost to being a transplant, since everyone is traveling to see everyone else. [/quote]

No, you’re the one that doesn’t get it. Just because a phenomenon does not apply to you, doesn’t mean it isn’t one. I never said every transplant in america gave up close family to prioritize prestige (though someone else came close to saying that). That’s why I said “there are multiple people in this thread.”

But I, and many transplants I know, basically are reading from that script. [/quote]

You are apparently confused as to why there isn’t this huge conversation about “what transplants give up,” as though we all give up the same thing.

Can you not see how you’re being narrow-minded around this?

Yes, not everyone has family spread around the country, but likewise, not everyone has a family that has stayed together in one town.

People have diverse situations. Deal with it.[/quote]

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