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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Completely ignore it.  If your MIL wants to say something to you or DH, she can.  Otherwise, you just pretend you heard nothing.  Your system works fine for you and your husband.  He does not want to spend holidays with his family; this is not your problem.  [/quote]

I agree.  It's unfortunate the MIL is fixed on celebrating the holidays on the actual day.  My family has a long history, for various reasons, of not being able to gather on the actual holiday/birthday.  We celebrate whenever we are together - isn't that what it's about, being together?

It's the DH's responsibility to manage the relationships with his family, not OP. [/quote]

But the family *could* gather on the actual day. Completely different. [/quote]

Lots of things 'could' be done.  OP's DH [i]could [/i]decide to spend more time with his mother.  He [i]could [/i]decide to stop working any holiday.  OP [i]could [/i]decide to pressure her DH to spend some holidays with her family - she doesn't.  OP [i]could [/i]decide she no longer wants to celebrate a holiday twice.  If MIL doesn't like the current situation, she should address it with her DS, not OP and not her grandchild. [/quote]

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