Reply to Really Difficult First Grade Girl

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Really Difficult First Grade Girl"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP again, the the Pp above who suggested we use the word "no"-- that comment you highlighted was not mine. We do use the word "no".

To the person who suggested I just wanted a diagnosis-- [b]I would love nothing more than to *not* have a diagnosis. I would love nothing more than to be told I'm crazy, and my kid is normal.[/b] If, though, she has something going on, I want to help her, and my instinct is that she is more difficult than her peers. I asked for advice here because I realize it isn't always easy to understand what is normal and what isn't regarding you own kid's behavior.

Lastly, for the person who asked-- she has a younger sibling with whom she is absolutely fantastic. My husband and I comment almost daily about how surprised we are that she is incredibly kind and caring with her sibling-- much moreso than with friends. They play beautifully together, she is careful, and they seldom fight. It's almost weird, but great, and the best part of parenting, for me.[/quote]

Hi, OP; new poster here. Your language above jumped out at me because that is how I often feel about my DD. She is 10, issues started emerging in early elementary, and she has anxiety, ADHD and now a HFA diagnosis too. So I feel like we're loaded up on diagnoses. BUT, most of our family and our friends would say she is "normal" - they don't see the hard stuff because she is bright, verbal, funny, & compensates really well, especially around adults. (Now, particularly, because we do medicate at low doses for the anxiety and ADHD.) But it can all fall to pieces at home, and friendships are hard. All that to say, these things are not mutually exclusive.

So, you have to parent the kid you have, whether or not you have any labels to apply to what is going on. I find that the diagnoses are so broad that while useful for providing a framework for interventions, they don't really capture my child. She is herself, wonderfully and maddeningly so. What has worked for us is talk therapy (for her, and for us), doing the Unstuck curriculum when she was older (helps with rigidity, engaging in non-preferred activities, and perspective taking), and now starting to think about social skills interventions. At your child's age, you might look up some resources at https://www.socialthinking.com/ (bonus - having a sale now!) to start talking about interacting with others and better understanding how her own choices affect others' feelings and behaviors towards her. I also liked the American Girls Smart Girls Guides at that age (Friendship and What to Say books are good). You will also find a lot of kind support and helpful suggestions over on the Kids with Special Needs forum.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics