Reply to How to be happy in a dead marriage.

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "How to be happy in a dead marriage. "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]

OP — Your marriage is unusual from most of the responses since you have a child with a serious disability who will need direct life support so the contours of your daily life are very different and perhaps you need to consider if you have tried to do it all or most of it for DC and just burned out or burned up on resentment for your spouse not doing his share.

Can you start with a full physical and mental health screening just in case there is a physical cause mental health issue that medication could help you rebalance?  Could seeing a therapist or participating in a support group where others know your daily challenges be a positive outlet in examining your life options? If you work full-time can you cut back to reduce stress in that area of life? If you are a  SAHM, can you find a part-time job or other interest to give your life more aspects than just being a caregiver.

In your case, has your husband had a mental health screening to see if he is just burnt out or depressed with life as you know it?  Have you and DH explored couples counseling and perhaps explored options relating to the care needs and future of your son or daughter?  Whatever happens between you two, it would be best to get plans in place for your child in legal/financial terms while together to have a plan of agreed upon care.  I realize if you have the financial means, these ideas are easier to pursue than without.

Just a note to say that maintaining a married relationship AND supporting a child throughout life can be simply just tiring even in a good relationship.  You need to find what works for you to give you some time to have a life, too.  Do not feel guilty if DS or DD watches movies or is on the computer for hours some times because mom needs a break, too.

Can you allow or encourage DH to be more involved with direct support of DS or DD?  Can you work out areas you can divide up whether in providing respite for you on a regular schedule to pursue your interests and nurture your friendships?  Likewise, I would assume you would do the same.  
If you have not done so, have you and DH made it a priority to have time together — it dies take extra effort/cost if DS or DD has special challenges — but it May be worth it.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics