Reply to Unequal inheritance

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Unequal inheritance "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Would it bother you if your parents left your sibling more than you because sibling chose not to work?[/quote]

Need more info as to why sibling isn't working for money
[/quote]

He doesn’t like working. He saved up some money 200k and quit the job he hated at 35. He is almost 50 now. He is divorced and lives with our parents over a decade. They pay most of his bills. He has been lazy since he was a kid. My mom wants to make it fair by giving him the house he lives in with them -worth over a million, then split the cash between the two of us. So she is rewarding his laziness.[/quote]

Doesn’t sound like a very happy life. Truly no reason for you to be jealous.

My siblings need more than me. I wish my parents had more to give them. I do my best to help. [/quote]
Since when does fairness equal jealousy?[/quote]

When you’re upset at what you perceive as a lack of fairness, it’s because you think someone has what you don’t, so jealousy. If you don’t like the word, sub in something else. The vocabulary doesn’t matter. It’s the attitude that’s going to cause problems.

No one on this board would want to trade places with an unemployed 50 yr old living at home with elderly parents. Sounds terrible. [/quote]
Jealous is the wrong word. Presumably OP works and has a lot more money than her brother, so why would she be jealous?[/quote]

NP here. I disagree.  I think jealous is the right word.  OP seems to think that her parents leaving her brother more says that they value him more and that they are favoring him by leaving him more money.  It's not.  The parents have made a decision to leave more inheritance for the child who makes less money and has less insurance, retirement, protection for the future.  While I understand that she blames her brother for being lazy, the point is that she could choose to live a bohemian lifestyle, give up working and live life with less and then be eligible for a more equal share of inheritance, but that isn't her choice.  She chooses to work, have more disposable income and be able to enjoy the fruits of her labor now.  Two different choices.

We have a similar situation.  My sister had a hard life, was abused by her ex-husband, divorced and was screwed in the divorce.  Instead of working in the field where she has her degree (graphics design), she has opted to take a job working in a floral shop.  She truly enjoys her job, her co-workers and her life.  It means that she can barely make ends meet.  She lives in our brother's old condo and my parents pay my brother rent for her.  My brother and I both have professional degrees and work and make very comfortable livings and support our families.  Our parents will be leaving 40-50% of their significant wealth to her with the rest divided between my brother and I.  Additionally, my sister has one child and my brother and I each have two children, so perforce, her child will get more money (if there is any left when my sister passes) than the other four grandchildren.  And you know what?  We're all fine with this.  We are a loving family and we know that hardships that my sister faced and that choices that she's made to be happy with her life after the trials she's been through.  There is enough to go around and if our parents did not provide as much for our sister and she had hardships, my brother and I would have to take care of her anyways.  This ensures that she will be able to care for herself without us paying to support her.

So, yes, OP is jealous that she feels that her parents value and love her brother more than her based solely on the distribution of their wealth.  That's a very entitled and petty way to view things, but very common.[/quote]

Your sister’s situation is completely different to OP’s brother who sounds like a parasite.[/quote]

Agree.  I also think this poster would have a MUCH different viewpoint if she and her brother wound up in financial straits, or had chosen careers where they barely made ends meet.  It's easy to sit on a high horse and look down on others.  If you and your brother wind up getting knocked on your ass and have nothing (due to serious illness, divorce, unemployment, medical bills, etc.) your perspective would change in a flash.    Then let's see how "fine" you would be with your sister getting half.  
[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics