Reply to How to kindly turn down hocom ask?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]"No thanks."  She doesn't owe him a reason why. If she wants, she can (quietly, so as not to embarrass him) say "I don't think we like each other in the same way."

But "No" is actually a complete sentence.[/quote]

There are some really nasty people on these boards. I don’t think that’s a nice way to let someone down. Don’t you want to raise your kids to be kind?[/quote]
+1 mom of 0 boys and 2 DDs

in real life, I don't think I've ever been in a conversation where someone has said "No." and that's it.  What do you do next, stare at each other?  If this PP actually has actually followed her own advice, I doubt she has many friends.  "No is a complete sentence" is just BS.  I do get the intent of the PP. But having the *right* to say no doesn't mean you shove it in some poor boy's face.

I think she should say something like, "Larlo, thank you for asking me.  I was already planning to go with Jack, but we hadn't added up so I had to go figure it out.  So I just wanted to thank you and let you know.  I know it's awkward but I appreciate your asking me."

(so just verbalizing the awkwardness makes it much better between the two of them)

By the way, OP, that your DD said "I'll think about it" when caught off-guard like that is a skill that is hard to learn (because when caught off guard, one's brain tends to not work well.)  I'm impressed that she said this![/quote]

I agree … this is the nicest response I've seen. Say something like this.

[/quote]

Why should she say she appreciates him asking? She doesn’t seem like she does. They’re not friends. It seems like that would encourage him more. [/quote]

Do you possess any social niceties at all?  Good grief.[/quote]

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