Reply to SAHM of teens — Crucial responsibilities

Forum Index » Tweens and Teens

Reply to "SAHM of teens — Crucial responsibilities "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DP here.

I am so sick and tired of seeing the same arguments on DCUM. have high achieving, self motivated, independent kids in highly selective STEM magnet programs in public high school. We are DC MC, 300k HHI, have retirement and college squared away.

DH and I are in agreement that with this kind of affluence (maybe in our own mind...since we are not wearing Prada), our teens are better served to have a highly educated mom available to them 24/7.

A lot of parents work very hard and I am very impressed with them. I have a cushy life and my kids and family get me as their support. I am lucky that my stress level is low and that I am ok financially. I do not need to be super rich with lots of money and very little time. I am ok with a comfortable lifestyle with ample time and a MC lifestyle. Maybe I do not have any ambition. I have my hobbies and causes, and only the people who don't know me are flapping their hands that I need to find my calling. My calling is to be able to leverage the money that my DH earns and build a comfortable, balanced and secure life for my family.

Do my kids need me? Yup. Without a doubt. More now than when they were babies? Well,  I am not changing their diapers or nursing them on demand, but it has given them an edge to have an educated personal assistant on their beck and call, so that they are on the straight and narrow, secure and healthy, and meeting their social, emotional, health, academic goals. Yes, we are doing everything by ourselves and not paying money to get admitted to elite colleges, but, so what? We are immigrants, Asians, no hook, not legacy, but we are educated, with intact family, without health problems and can figure out the rest of things if we continue to be lucky.

If you and your kids do not need a parent at home then good for you. Maybe,  most of you are super parents who can do it all? Great marriages, great health, great high achieving straight A kids, super organized homes, pillars of society, amazing careers where you are indispensable, high earners, globe trotting influencers and Illuminati? I am neither that high energy nor that ambitious for myself or my kids.[/quote]

You know this makes total sense to me. You don’t have any desire to work, your husband is on board, and you believe your being home is in the best interest of your family. Looks like you hit the trifecta - your choices seem to work well for you.

I do want to know what you mean when you say “our teens are better served to have a highly educated mom available to them 24/7”. Do you believe all teens would be thus served, or are you talking specifically about your own kids?  If the latter, I have no argument (how could I). If the former, we can have a debate. [/quote]

It is the latter. My kids are better served having me around. I also want to add here - ALL parents make this sort of calculations, ALL the time. They weigh -  their financial needs, family needs, career health needs,  marriage needs, kids needs and that is included in their calculus.

I have never ever found men bad-mouthing SAHMs or WOHMs for their career or parenting choices. The only thing men complain on DCUM is the lack of sex and intimacy in their marriage.  The women on the other hand - OMG!!  They are such jealous nasty PABs.  [/quote]

You don’t hear what they say in the office! So many men with SAHWs are complete assholes.[/quote]

Maybe in your experience.  The men I work with whose wives are SAHMs are great.  Always understanding about family issues and just far more empathetic in general.
-DP[/quote]

My experience too. They know they have it easier and that their family life balance gives them an edge.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics