Reply to Ex wants to move out of state-- what are the questions to ask and pitfalls to avoid?

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Reply to "Ex wants to move out of state-- what are the questions to ask and pitfalls to avoid?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Ex and I had our conversation. I took the advice I got here and mostly listened, not getting emotional or making any demands.

Ex hoped I would agree to ds being with him the whole summer, except for the week after school lets out, and the week before school starts again! Seriously?! I calmly said that was a no go. That would give me and ds no time to relax or have fun together. Definitely no time for us to take a trip! Ds agreed that he wanted enough days with me in the summer to actually DO something together. Ex said he would think on that.

I asked if Ex was planning on visiting ds here at any time during the school year (no), or if he was expecting to have ds come to him at any time other than either Spring or Winter break (also no). Ex said he would pay for ds to take a flight back and forth. I asked, what about if ds has summer opportunities he wants to stay in DC for, and Ex said we'd discuss that when and if it happened.

He also said that he would adjust child support, although he wouldn't give a single detail of his thoughts on that.

Basically, we had a civil conversation that didn't really decide anything.

For the record, Ex has less than 50/50 custody by HIS choice. He and his lawyer worked out the balance so that he could have the least visitation and pay the lowest amount of child support. I don't know what gives some posters the idea that I am shafting Ex![/quote]

It is hard to believe that such a long post could get every single point wrong, and yet here we are.

OP, don't listen to this buffoon.  None of this is correct.  You're instincts are right on.

You ex isn't entitled to the entire summer, especially since it's him that's moving, and your son doesn't want to spend the entire summer there.  I know no HS kid alive who would want to be separated from his friends for the entire summer.  He can "think about it" all he wants, but he's not getting that, and no court would order it.  [/quote]

You cannot say ex does not want custody or time share if you refuse him a reasonable schedule.  Family is always more important than friends.  You think friends are more important than his relationship with his Dad.  What if Dad had custody and you only got a few weeks and Dad blocked it saying friends are more important?  Would that be ok?

I get sick of women saying Dad is not involved when in reality it is they will not let Dad be involved.

OP hasn't offered a reasonable visitation schedule and refused what Dad requested.  She should come up with a good schedule if she is refusing his.[/quote]

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