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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The drop off / pick up time of the middle kid is the key here. Have her hire a regular babysitter / nanny NOT a mother’s helper. Have that person come while the baby is getting ready for nap / napping / waking up. That way, she can take the middle to camp and the older where ever but the baby gets good naps in and the nanny can do all the bottle washing, chopping baby food into small pieces. On days when older has no activity, nanny plays with older.

Get her house cleaning for Tuesday am. You meet them, vet them, and explain what you want done. Monday night you pick up and de clutter everything. Tuesday am she goes to do whatever and is back by lunch. She thinks it is too much but once she does not have to scrub the toilet or change the sheets she will love it.[/quote]
+1
There are lots of good ideas, but I think these two are the biggest. You need to develop a regular babysitter/nanny process for the longer term who can help with school pickup (or meeting the bus) and watching/entertaining oldest or youngest at different times even during the school year. I have a friend who has a set of three high school girls who watch her 2 elementary school SN kids for 2 hours daily, and they coordinate among themselves to ensure full coverage of time.

Regarding the cleaning - you don't have to go all in on a full cleaning service. You may be able to find someone who will clean less often. We have a local person who comes every two weeks to just vacuum, mop the floor, and clean all the bathrooms and kitchen. We don't have to leave and aren't perfectly decluttered. She'll move things and straighten as needed to clean, but otherwise just works around all the daily mess. We don't want (or need) a perfect looking house. We just wanted those 4 hours of time for other things.

The other suggestion I have is regarding food and meal planning. If you haven't already, take the time to create a two-week plan (or whatever works for you) figure out the groceries needed and then schedule grocery delivery. Planning and managing meals just takes a lot of mental power. Pre-planning and having the majority of basics delivery will reduce that load.[/quote]

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