Reply to Just Completed Disastrous Freshman Year

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I posted about my DS upthread, but one piece of advice we got somewhat late in the game, but was so crucial, was to forge as much connection with your DS outside of the school situation as possible. Frame your thinking as he is having a hard time, not giving you a hard time and then connect with him in every other way. For my DS, this was through food (he was always willing to go out to eat with me and we would talk about anything BUT school - let him talk about WHATEVER he wants), DH would watch basketball with him whenever possible, and I would listen to rap music (which I hate, but he loves) whenever we were in the car together. Those connections are what will see you through the other side of this. (And I know - incredibly hard when there is so much stress and conflict in the picture.)[/quote]

+1. I have a 9th grader who can be very uncommunicative, but going to lunch is our thing.  I spend more money than we would if we eat at home, but we have a rule that you can't look at your phone in the restaurant, so he's forced to talk to me.  When we're driving in the car, we also listen to podcasts about things that interest him and we talk about that.  I now know more about the NBA and NHL than I ever thought I would, although it's actually really handy at cocktail parties when I have to talk to men I don't know.  [/quote]

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