Reply to Did you have any *unexpected* divorce regrets?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The only thing I regret is we didn't do it sooner. Sure, all of the things listed were part of the process and it was tough for awhile, but everyone is happier now. The kids have made that very clear. I didn't realize how bad it was for them in a home where[b] their parents never showed intimacy or genuine love to each other.[/b] Sure, we piled all kinds of love on our kids, but not with one another. My kids let me know they knew it was over before we even did.[/quote]

This is such BS. Kids don’t want to see their parents having intimacy - that’s all about you. 
And what exactly kept you from being loving towards the spouse that you married and had babies with? You sound awful.[/quote]

First, yes kids do want to see their parents show love for one another. I can guarantee you if your kids are going over for playdates to homes where the parents have a genuine connection and are true partners in every way they know that's not what they have at home. That is how my two daughters brought it up to me. They came to me and told me I can tell you and dad are miserable and they want to see me smile more, "Jill's" home is so different, etc. You can tell yourself that it's better for the kids, but when you are miserable with your life, you can't give your kids 100%.

As far ad not being loving, please. He didn't show any interest either. We fought a lot, we stopped hugging, holding hands, getting angry at the smallest thing, etc. I am not talking about making out, I am talking about showing your kids how they should be treated in a marriage. I didn't want my two girls to think that kind of marriage is okay. He wasn't a bad man, he is, in fact, an amazing father, and now that I see him with his wife, I know were were just oil and water. I adore his wife, she is his person no doubt about it. Just like my husband is my person. We just work, it take little effort.

Look, we got married at 18 because I was pregnant. We tried to put on a happy face, even had three kids. I did what I felt was right and I came from a conservative family, so divorcing was so taboo. It took us 10 years to finally realize we never should have gotten married in the first place. We are great friends and we have no regrets now.

Sorry you seem to be upset but we are one big happy family, with warts and all![/quote]

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