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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Are you 100% sure that taking the teaching job would require her to completely quit working for your family?  I was in a similar situation and it has worked out wonderfully.  Our nanny taught while my child was in a different class at the school.  [/quote]

Nanny was sounding hopeful that she could work at the school then easily pick DD up since they would be at the same school.  But I think for that to work, I'd have to extend DD's day by an hour since I don't think any of the teachers' day ends right at pick-up.  
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Well, I don't know your school.  In our case, right- the teacher/nanny's day did not end right at the time my childrens' day ended because there was some cleanup/prep for the next day involved.  It wasn't an hour each day, more like 15-20 minutes after.  My kids also went to school about 20 minutes early to "help" set up.  They thought it was fun.  The mostly played and sometimes did extra crafts.  I think they liked being the only kids who got to be in the classrooms at those times.  I didn't care because that's pretty much the same thing they would be doing with our nanny at home.  I guess if that's a dealbreaker for you, then the teaching and nannying positions are mutually exclusive.

For what it's worth, I think it's a fair assumption by the preschool teacher that because your nanny works part time, she would be able to fill some of the hours she wasn't working without disrupting her arrangement with your family.  
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First, thanks for not roasting me like everyone else.  Your kids' preschool sounds a lot more flexible than ours.  I would be fine with extending DD's day by half an hour, I'd have to pay for a full hour, but I can certainly live with that.  As to what the teacher assumed - DD's preschool is full-time and likewise, the teachers all work full days.  I don't see how she could think that nanny would continue to work for our family even on a PT basis if she was working 40 hours/week at the school.[/quote]

Yes, our preschool was different- it was a part time school where all the kids get dropped off and picked up at the same time.  So we had a schedule, our nanny could take our oldest child to the bus stop, then take the other 2 kids to the preschool a bit early; they played while she set up; then they all went to class; then they played around a bit after dismissal; home for lunch and nap, if necessary or playdates, etc; then bus stop to pick up oldest kid.  It sounds like what you're saying is that your nanny typically picks your child up from school at one time, say 4:30, but other kids don't get picked up until 5:30 and so your daughter would have to remain in her class, with you paying for the extra hour, until the nanny is off duty for this to work out.  Right?  I think that's harder but maybe still doable, but again I know that there are a lot of little things that go into orchestrating schedules.  There were a few times when our arrangement was a pain but it worked because both sides were flexible.

I'm not going to roast you- I think traumatized is overstating it but that's been said.  I guess what I would say is this- I hate being this person who is like, my kids are older, i know everything....but.  As someone who had pretty thin skin and was easy to offend for most of my life, maybe take this as an opportunity to model better behavior for your kid.  Trust me, as my kids got older there were plenty of times when they came home upset about something that happened at school, or a sports game, or they described something that seemed off to me.  If you assume that people have ill will toward your kids or family in every one of these situations it's going to be a long road.  Your daughter is 3- even if she's not the most resilient kid now, she has so much more time to build that skill and you can help her.  If, worst case scenario, your nanny gets the job and is in a different class from your daughter every day, it's to your daughter's benefit to model good behavior.  I am constantly telling my kids - and myself! - to assume the best of other people, to recognize that there are other kids and families with different needs, and to be happy for other people when something good happens, even if it wasn't the day when something good happened for you.  You can help your daughter be excited about being the kid who introduced the nanny and the preschool and because of that the nanny has this great new opportunity to teach lots of kids instead of just one.  She'll still get to see her every day and maybe have special dates if she babysits from time to time.

I get some of your displeasure- the preschool teacher probably wasn't thinking about the fact that she could be leaving your family in a bind with having to find another nanny.  But honestly...it's kind of out of your control at this point.

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