Reply to It takes a village and I have no village

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]People in DC suck. The worst part of it is how unaware they are of how much they suck. The "close friends" who volunteered to take me to the hospital when my baby came, answered the phone at 10 minutes after midnight and told me, as I panted with contractions very close together, that it was too late on a weeknight to leave the house, and I should take a cab. My doula got on the phone with them, when she heard my summary of what they'd said before hanging up, and told them again what was going on. She was livid, disgusted. Those folks never apologized. They still think they're kind, generous, open, helpful, probably have half a dozen stories of how charitable of selfless they are.

I've had 2 emergencies that made me call friends since then, although those times in the middle of the afternoon. In both cases, the phone kept on ringing. Maybe, as I've seen suggested on this forum, just in case I was going to ask for last-minute childcare, which I've never done with a phone call, and may have done with a group text 3 times in 5 years. No, one of these 2 emergency phone calls, I thought I was going to bleed to death in front of my kids. Turns out I didn't, but I didn't realize that while I was dialing with one hand and pushing on the wound with another and watching my calls to my neighbor "friends" get screened out.

People suck. Funny someone upthread wrote "did you ASK someone to help you?" Reminds me of a non-friend who is a pro at letting other people's requests for help slide right off her back in person, or into voicemail, and never offering help when it seems needed, and is also great at scolding folks in hindsight for not asking clearly enough, loudly enough, urgently enough.

They all love their pussy hats and think their values beat your values, but DC is full of selfish people who like to pretend they're part of a village when they're not.[/quote]

Why were you texting friends and not calling 911?

Sometimes you ask and the answer is no. Sometimes other people have stuff going on in their lives as well and maybe you don't know it. Sometimes phones are muted because people are napping or sick.

OP: I am glad that you have opened your house and your heart to people. I get that there are things that you do without being asked that others don't do. We have done similar things. We have had Thanksgiving and Christmas for local folks without family. We do it because we enjoy sharing that time with our friends. I cna't say that it bothers me that we have not been invited to other peoples houses for the same event, that is their call. We are comfortable having folks to out place, it doesn't feel like a burden. But I know that most of those same people would help if we really needed help. But we would have to ask.

[/quote]

Two things for you to work on: 1. defensiveness to strangers' posts, and 2. reading comprehension. I'll work on calling 911 more and understanding that people have things going on in their lives.[/quote]

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