Reply to How to deal with family member who has been accused of sexual abuse

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Most men who sexually abuse children have multiple victims.  I was abused by someone outside my family and then also by both parents.  When I went to the police to report this as an adult, the statute of limitations had not passed, but the state's attorney didn't feel like it was a "winnable" case.  Still, I feel like it was worth it.  It put all the perpetrators on the radar of the police and a report was on file.  The detective who took the report told me that the average abuser has at least 60 victims.  60.

Regarding what to tell your own children:  I cut off contact with my entire family and every single person who supported the perpetrators in any way.  So, my kids were never alone with them, and by the time my second child was born we stopped all contact.  My daughter was 2 when we stopped seeing them.  She did remember them and asked why we didn't see them.  I just said they "hurt mommy".  When they got older, I simply said there was abuse, without going into any details.  [/quote]

I'm so sorry this happened to you. I applaud your bravery for coming forward to the police years later to try to protect potential future victims. Please know that there may be behind the scenes activities going on. Perhaps a detective would monitor them electronically or this tip from you could be used in some other way to apprehend the perps. If someone else comes forward then you could be a witness because the police would know to contact you. You've done what you could. Thank you and best wishes for a happy, healthy life to you and your family.[/quote]

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