Reply to How to raise “popular” kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There’s good popular (naturally liked by many for the right reasons) and there’s not so good popular. Social engineering by parents results in not so good popular.[/quote]

[b]The good-popular kids are those who are friendly, outgoing, and nice to everyone--[/b]those are the kids that everyone likes.  Some of that is just personality, but you can help your kid develop good manners and social skills, encourage friendships, etc.  The bad-popular kids are those whose standing is based on exclusion and manipulation, and parents can feed that, too.  [/quote]

as adults and parents,[b] this is the way we see these kids but now my kid is older, in high school, and I can look back and say we as parents had blinders on. [/b]

[b]The popular kids were good at being nice to adults [/b]and nice to most kids but they were also good at being a little bit snarky and sometimes exclusive.  That's what helped them gain popularity.  [b]Exclusivity is an important element for kids socially.[/b] It's developmentally appropriate at certain stages as well. The trick is that kids have to learn to not get too vested and to be able to move beyond it.

[/quote]

This.  I'm a 5th grade teacher and the bolded part is dead on. [/quote]

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