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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I've been at both ends of the spectrum about this.  Got married young-ish at 25.  DH really wanted kids and I was very ambivalent.  I wanted to enjoy my 20s and did not feel ready for motherhood at all.  He agreed to wait until we were 30 so that we could both finish grad school.  At 30 he was really ready and I was still very ambivalent.  I liked our lifestyle and couldn't imagine myself as a Mom.  I also didn't have a strong desire towards motherhood.  I didn't know anything about motherhood because I myself am an only child, never grew up with cousins, didn't have any friends with kids, etc.  He, on the other hand, could not imagine his life without a child/children.

He insisted that we start trying and we had many tearful conversations about it because I was so ambivalent, but leaning toward being childfree.  I still kept putting it off until I was 33.  Then I finally agreed to start TTC.  Low and behold we got pregnant on the first try and I was terrified.  Scared out of my mind because I thought I'd have a few months to get used to the idea of being pregnant.  My pregnancy was anxiety-filled because I was anxious about motherhood.

My pregnancy was super easy though and I had an easy, natural delivery and happy and healthy baby.

It turned out that I loved being a mom and this time we were both eager to have a second.  This time I had an intense longing to have another child and expand our family because I knew how wonderful motherhood was.  We started TTC #2 when I was 35 and my son was 1 year old.  Sadly I was soon to learn that my fertility had gone out the window by that time and I had severe decreased ovarian reserve.  I was in the infertility clinic at 35 and they gave me less than a 10% chance of ever being pregnant again.  In fact a few REs said I probably had severe infertility problems all along but just got lucky by getting pregnant on the first try.

We have now been TTC #2 for 5 years and zero pregnancies.  Now that I'm 40 I feel that it is really hopeless now.  I feel so sad that I waited so long because maybe if I had started earlier I'd be able to have two kids by now.[/quote]

This is OP here - and I'm so sorry that you are feeling sad. That sounds really hard. (I hope you know you didn't do anything wrong by not starting young, when you weren't ready. You made the best choices you could given the things you knew and felt.) [/quote]

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