Reply to Stepparents, how much money have you spent on/do you spend on your spouse's children?

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Reply to "Stepparents, how much money have you spent on/do you spend on your spouse's children?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We merged fInances and had custody of my stepchild, so I paid for essentially 50% of my stepchild’s expenses.  Mom spent almost nothing, expecting us to send money to cover everything from groceries to incidentals when stepchild visited during the summer. [/quote]

I am in the same boat. Bio-mom is not in the picture except for a few visits a year and we cover everything (my DH never filed for child support). I cover my step-DD health insurance/co-pays and we count groceries as general family expense. She tells me what she prefers to eat and I buy within reason. I used to cover my step-DD activities and tutors, but stopped a few months back since it is really my DH's responsibility. I cover our two bio children daycare expenses out my own paycheck (my DH does not contribute at all) as well their other expenses--clothes, doctor co-pays, and activities. My DH does not contribute a dime from his income towards our bio-kids. He pretty much provides the roof over our head (4k mortgage), pays car insurance, electricity/gas, and trash removal. I also make car payments on all three cars, my step-DD drives one of them. I have been handed a really crappy deal and can't wait until step--DD is off to college![/quote]

Do you guys split every single expense?

It sounds exhausting to live like that. It much easier to merge finances. No matter how you slice it there is no keeping money separate once you get married - hopefully you figure this out before the divorce. [/quote]

NP. It doesn't sound like the PP is splitting expenses. It sounds like she's paying for EVERYTHING while her husband gets off scot-free. He doesn't contribute to their children together, but she pays towards his daughter??? Tell me that doesn't rub you the wrong way. [/quote]

He pays for the full mortgage - that’s a lot money - probably the same as she pays for daycare.

That’s why I think this bean counting is stupid. Make a budget together. Sure, it might make you feel good that nothing from your salary goes to your Stepkid, but guess what? If it comes from dads paycheck, it’s from household money. It’s a stupid distinction. [/quote]

Yes, but the mortgage needs to be paid anyway. So DW without kids should pay for that instead of SD's tuition. They got their financial arrangements all screwed up. [/quote]

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